so my Yoga instructor said something today that felt like a light bulb turning on. while talking about letting go and taking care of yourself she said "taking time for yourself is the lest selfish thing you can ever do. because if you don't then you start to become a burden to those around you, whether emotionally or physically."
wow.
this hit me right between the eyes. lately i have felt like emotionally i am a burden to my friends, so i'd like to say sorry for that. i realize that it's because all the crap that has been going on in my life personally and with my family, i haven't been taking time to take care of myself, therefore i am becoming emotionally stressed out. i don't like showing emotion, so instead it comes out in moodiness and constant complaining about things that frankly, i really don't care about.
so now i think that i need to focus on taking time for myself... taking care of myself! now, seems how i LOVE list, here is my list for right now...

i need to eat better (like planing my meals out)
i need to work out more, i always feel better when i do.
i need to keep my living area clean (don't get too excited mom, i'm talking about my room not the kitchen)
i need to have more good Scripture studies.
i need to have fuller prayers

so that's the list, and that's what i'm going to focus on, so that i'm not such a burden and can be more of a strength to those who need me.

PS i really, really, really, really, want to learn how to play the accordion